Our Sentiments

Mothering and Life in General

Gay or Dead?

I am a reader, I love to read. Lately I have been searching around other people blogs just to fulfill my need for written contact. There are so many lovely blogs out there, some I agree fully and can relate too. Others are thought provoking or they tie at my heart-strings.

This morning I ran into a blog using Facebook Networked Blogs, Warfare: The Delightful and Dreary Sides of Gay Life. I found this to be one of the most saddest stories related to Gay Life I have ever heard. It got me thinking and I would like to share my views here.

Wow does this post get you thinking. Is it really that much of a big deal if your child is gay? Would you rather to accept the child as gay than them being dead?

Why should I care if my child loves the same-sex? I only care that my child is being the best they can be. I would rather our daughters and any future sons to be in a relationship that fulfills them, that completes them. A relationship to where they experience the finer things from human contact.

Would I want to choose? I say I don’t have too, but I hope our children never have to pick death because the lack of acceptance. I love my children in every aspect in their life. I try to be good to them, and be what they need. Would I care if they are gay? I think there are other things greater to worry about than that like drugs, rape, abduction and abuse.

Would I turn my back on my child for loving or being attracted to the same-sex or even both? Not in this lifetime and not even in death. Why would I? I truly can’t seem to understand or walk in those shoes to think anything differently. Why would a parent’s love and affection end when it’s known about their child’s sexuality? Mine would not stop, it just would continue.

I understand every parent would like their children to have more than what they had and to live life in which we as parents intended. But matters of the heart can’t be controlled. Would I as a parent want to control this, only if my child’s companion is harming them. We also have to understand that as parents our visions are not our child’s. We have to honor this.

So in closing I say this to my children. I love you, I always will. You both have been the most important thing, the only thing that matters. I just want happiness to be your life. I want you to learn about the world and be safe in it. I would like to see all your dreams be just a blink away. I want you to love and be loved. Most of all I want you to remember that you are accepted, my heart will always have an open door, come in when you need. When there are no words to say I will hug you. If there are no words needed I will kiss you. Remember this, feel this, embrace this. I love you.

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One response to “Gay or Dead?

  1. DrD January 25, 2010 at 4:31 am

    Well said, and what a lovely post for your children to read in the future. I think it is extremely sad when parents reject a child for any reason, particularly around an issue like their sexual orientation which is completely out of their control. We live in modern times, who cares if someone is gay? I have gay friends, colleagues and relatives and I honestly don’t give their homosexuality a second thought.

    As a child psychiatrist, I have sadly seen lots of adolescents with serious mental health issues stemming from their family’s reaction to them. As a mum, I agree with you that I would love my child regardless…

    Thanks for visiting my blog too, I really appreaciated your comment 🙂

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