Mothering and Life in General
GERD (Silent) Part 3
We continued to see the pediatrician, even though I knew nothing was about reflux anymore. I told her I think the medication is the issue, maybe the dose of the fact that K2’s body knows what the medication is doing and compensating.
After the pediatrician saying that it might be, but she does not think K2 could have gained enough for a dose increase. So she weighed her, finding out that I was correct. She needed a dose increase. I was given the proper dose and the encouragement that K2 is now on a higher percentile, so things are looking good.
This check-up would be the cause of the rest of my love-hate relationship. You see now that K2 was on a different curve she was expected to stay on that curve. K2 being 18 pounds for months was not sitting right with the pediatrician. Reason being she was going back down on to the curve she was at birth.
She was telling me weird things like maybe K2 was lactose intolerant and should be put on soy milks. I was baffled. If my family doctor wont put me on the Birth Control Pill because I still breastfeed and the hormones will go to K2 causing her premature puberty, than why recommend Soy products? After all Soy has more estrogen-like substances than my Birth Control!
I was not trying to be a difficult mother, I just wanted to stay within the WHO requirements and give K2 the best I personally could. After all, it was this pediatrician that agreed that breastmilk is the best for an Acid Reflux child. Now she was going back on that.
Frustration. That is all this was. I would return home month after month with calorie amounts and DH saying I was starving his daughter. Well for one I have eating disorders, so force feeding my children is NOT and option, when we all know that force feeding leads to this issue.
What is a mother to do? The health nurse who came in to our home and my father where my only support, in real life. Nobody else seemed to understand my love-hate feelings for K2’s Doctor. I would endlessly be on Kellymom’s Forum looking for other mother’s who have Failure to Thrive babies.
Then I found out this tidbit of insightful information. Doctors are still using CDC growth charts instead of using the new WHO charts for Breastfeed babies. These CDC growth charts are from results from mostly formula feed babies. As we all know, breastfeed babies and formula feed babies grow differently.
Now why do I mention this? Well K2 was being measure against her formula feeding peers. When I compared the list of weights. She was always on the scale she was born on. Not below, like the CDC Charts say. She was not failure to thrive.
Do you see where I am going with this? All this time it’s become not an issue of GERD, but the fact that my daughter is tiny. If the Pediatrician would listen to the family history of small people, then look at me (5’4″ at 110 pounds) you would see, it’s genetics!
Nope, my daughter was failure to thrive in her eyes, and I was difficult. I just ended up going there for the refill of the medications and to see about how much she weighed for car-seat purposes only.
I can’t tell you how many times I was misinformed about breastfeeding. If it was not for Kellymom, telling me that what the Pediatrician was telling me where nothing but myths, I would not be breastfeeding my daughter to this day.
Towards the end of the visits, when K2 was a few months shy of turning two, I discussed us chancing weaning of the medications. I was through with all of this, I just wanted to go home and forget the monthly reminder of how much of a failure I was at mothering.
On her 2nd birthday she was medication free, and we where starting our lives over, getting to know the way life was supposed to be for us. It was wonderful. To think another thing we conquered – together.
Story to continue…
Find Part 1 here.
If you live in Canada you might be interested in this News article about the WHO growth charts being used. For those parents struggling with growth issues, this is something to read.